1. Pay close
attention to the signals of your heart
"The heart has its reasons, which
reason does not know.
We feel it in a thousand things.
It is the heart which experiences
God, and not the reason.
This, then, is faith: God felt by
the heart, not by the reason."
If you love to live your life with
your heart wide open, and if being kind, generous, loving and
compassionate are things that come naturally to you, continue
doing what you are doing.
Continue being yourself. Don't keep
your light from shining and don't try to shut your love from
others simply because some people have a problem with that. But
make sure to always pay close attention to the signals your
heart and soul are sending your way.
If you feel that something is off
about a certain person, and even if to your rational mind it
makes no sense to feel what you are feeling, choose to listen to
your heart. Pay close attention to the signals your heart is
sending your way and act accordingly.
Keep in mind that people are not
always what they seem.
"People trust their eyes
above all else - but most people see what they wish to see,
or what they believe they should
see; not what is really there"
2. People are not
always what they seem to be
"And thus I clothe my naked
With odd old ends stol'n out of holy
And seem a saint, when most I play
Whether we like it or not, we live in a world where people wear
all kind of masks, pretending to be something they are not and
constantly playing different roles and adopting different
attitudes based on the people they interact with.
One moment they wear a certain
costume, and the next one, a totally different one. Depending on
who they interact with, and depending on how much they think you
can help them to get the things they want out of life, they are
either charming or not so charming.
Pay close attention to how people interact not just with you,
but with everyone else.
See if there is attitude-behavior
consistency and if you notice that their behavior changes based
on the importance of the person they interact with, you should
keep your eyes wide open and see them for who they truly are and
not for who they pretend to be.
3. Be slow to
fall into friendship
"Be slow to fall into
but when thou art in, continue firm
Even though it's nice to have a lot of friends, you have to
remember that real friendships take time.
They don't just happen overnight. In
order for you to build a real and valuable friendship, and in
order for you to have a deep and profound connection with
someone, you have to first lay a strong foundation.
So make sure you lay a strong
foundation first before rushing into calling someone your BFF.
yourself enough to walk away
"There comes a time in your
when you have to let go of all the
and the people who create it and
with people who make you laugh so
that you forget the bad and focus
solely on the good.
After all, life is too short to be
anything but happy."
Karl Marx (composer)
Respect yourself enough to walk away from all those people who
are poisoning your heart, your mind, your soul and your life.
Listen to what your heart is telling you.
Pay close attention to the feelings
in your body, and choose to be honest with yourself. Let no one
keep you from living your life in a loving, peaceful, harmonious
and balanced way.
5. Don't take it
"Don't take anything
Nothing others do is because of you.
What others say and do is a
projection of their own reality, their own dream.
When you are immune to the opinions
and actions of others,
you won't be the victim of needless
Don Miguel Ruiz
No matter how many times you get hurt because of what others say
or do to you, you should always remind yourself that their toxic
and unhealthy words, actions and behaviors have little or
nothing to do with you, but a lot to do with who they are.
Keep in mind that people give what
they have in their hearts to give. And if they act in selfish,
mean, unkind and loving ways, that's because their hearts are
full of fear, full of darkness, and full of pain.
Don't take it personally.
6. Don't let the
toxic behavior of one person make you think that all people are
"You must not lose faith in
Humanity is like an ocean;
if a few drops of the ocean are
the ocean does not become dirty."
Chances are that you will encounter quite a few people who will
use you, who will lie to you, and who will do things that will
cause you to feel hurt, disappointed and betrayed.
And even though your mind might try
to generalize, wanting you to think that all people are mean and
evil, and that you can't really trust anyone, you have to make
sure that you don't allow those things to become your beliefs.
Don't allow the toxic behavior of
one person to cause you to think that all people are bad.
fight fire with fire… you'll end up in ashes
"People who fight fire with
usually end up with ashes."
If someone acts against their true nature, being false, and
projecting their pain and hurt onto you, you have to be very
careful not to fall into the trap of thinking that you have to
"fight them with the same weapons".
Because if you do, if you fight fire
with fire, and anger with hate and resentment, without even
realizing it, you will start acting against your true nature;
being false and allowing your heart to be poisoned by all that
darkness and negativity.
Don't fight fire with fire, because,
"Darkness cannot drive out
darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out
hate; only love can do that."
Martin Luther King, Jr.
8. Let love be
Love is who we are. Love is what gives us power, radiance and
strength to continue to believe in the goodness of people and
the beauty of life.
There is no force more powerful than
that of love. A pure, honest and loving heart, even though it is
seen by many as a "weak" and "soft heart", it is one of the most
powerful weapons you can have against everything that is dark,
evil and unkind.
Love is your superpower. And if you can let love be your guide,
keeping your heart safe and protected at all times, then you
will know how to live in peace and harmony among people who
aren't always acting in alignment with their pure, kind and
You will know how to love those who
act in unkind and unloving ways towards you.
And by doing so, your heart will be
filled with more and more love and radiance, and your life with
more and more beauty, prosperity, happiness and abundance of all
When faced with a toxic person, do you you fight fire with fire
and toxicity with toxicity, or do you "fight" back with LOVE?