1.) They speak a language
older than words
"Crazy wisdom is the
articulation in life of the realization that the
phenomenal world (samsara)
and the transcendental Reality (nirvana)
share the same essence."
Georg Feuerstein
Self-actualized people tend to be
acutely aware of the interconnectedness of all things.
As such, they are able to form deep
relationships with nature. From these relationships develops a
profound nonverbal communication, what Derrick Jensen
refers to as, "a language older than words."
It's in the body, resonating within
an ancient muscle memory. You have to be still to hear it. You
have to be silent to realize how loud it really is.
By relearning this nonverbal
language, we open ourselves up to the
majesty of the cosmos and allow
for the inner-workings of nature to rethread itself through us.
It can be as simple as the body
warning us that we've consumed too little water, or as complex
as the cosmos pinpointing for us what is the healthy way for a
human being to live in an interconnected world. Until we can
relearn this language, and once again engage in a healthy
dialogue with nature and the cosmos, we will continue to be
tricked by the less evolved aspect of ourselves.
Self-actualized people are able to
learn from this deep dialogue with nature, and are therefore
rarely tricked by the less evolved aspects of themselves.
2.) They embrace solitude
"Solitude is not an
absence of energy or action, as some believe, but is
rather a boon of wild provisions transmitted to us from
the soul.
Purposeful solitude is both
palliative and preventative. It is used to prevent
fatigue and weariness."
Clarissa Pinkola Estes
Self-actualized people are able to
get away from the cultural rat-race and embrace solitude.
As it stands, the loss of Soul in
our culture has become untenable. Hegel's "silent weaving of the
spirit" has unraveled into discordant knots of anxiety and
neurosis. We live in a dog-eat-dog society of nine-to-five wage
slavery, brainwashed into working jobs we don't like in order to
buy things we don't need.
Self-actualized people are aware of
this. And even if they are currently stuck in such a pattern,
they at least understand how important solitude is for
the human soul to breathe. In a lot of ways solitude with nature
is where we learn a language older than words.
But losing ourselves in the wild is
about rediscovering a balance between nature and the human soul.
It's about trumping the noisy ego with sacred silence. Solitude
teaches us how to be quiet in order to reconnect.
We find that the more we open up to
the world, the more the world opens up to us.
3.) They are radically
creative
"There can be no
transformation in the world outside unless there is
transformation from within. It is our responsibility to
bring about a radical transformation within ourselves."
Krishnamurti
Self-actualized people are
determined to connect the disconnected by using authentic
artistic expression as their vehicle.
They are extremely innovative and
are able to use rebellion and art as a tool for obliterating
unsustainable hierarchies and close-minded elitism. They are not
driven by petty revenge or egoistic one-upmanship. They
empathize and actualize as they disrupt, seeking not to
discredit and embarrass the status quo with their mischief, but
to shock it into becoming more authentic.
Self-actualized people celebrate the
soul instead of the conditioned reflexes of the ego.
They celebrate through their radical
artistic expression, and they love what they profane. Weaving
their knowledge and experience together in creative ways, they
stir up the stagnant status quo, honoring their engagement with
it even as they tweak it out of its extremism.
They understand intuitively what
Martin Luther King Jr. meant when he said,
"Those who love peace must learn
to organize as effectively as those who love war."
4.) They practice mindful
meditation
"When the creative power of
the universe becomes conscious of itself, it manifests
as joy. You don't have to wait for something
'meaningful' to come into your life so that you can
finally enjoy what you do.
There is more meaning in joy
than you will ever need. The 'waiting to start living'
is one of the most common delusions of the unconscious
state.
Expansion and positive
change is more likely to come into your life if you can
enjoy what you are doing already, instead of waiting for
some change so you can start enjoying what you do."
Eckhart Tolle - A New
Earth
Self-actualized people realize that
the universe itself is a vibrating orchestra of varying
frequencies all in superposition with each other.
Essentially, mindful meditation is
the act of familiarizing ourselves with our own unique
contribution to this orchestra. Learning how to meditate is
becoming present to the interconnectedness of all things. When
we meditate we come to realize that we are both the seer and the
seen.
We are an extension of the universe
becoming aware of itself. This is the importance of presence.
Being in the moment, and especially being quiet and listening to
what the moment has to say, is the foundation of healthy,
mindful meditation.
Self-actualized people understand
that with enough meditation practice we can, like Thomas
Berry said,
"Move the human community from
its destructive presence on the planet to a benign or
mutually enhancing presence on the planet."
5.) They are able to form
deep relationships
"People were created to be
loved. Things were created to be used. The reason the
world is in chaos is because things are being loved, and
people are being used"
Anonymous
Self-actualized people practice
relationship-based love as opposed to the ownership-based love
that is rampant in our society.
They are able to integrate rather
than segregate. They understand that a healthy relationship is
neither other nor self: it is both at once. We live in a world
of immeasurably complex relationships that can only be
understood when the veil of deceit and spoon-fed lies drops and
we are able to engage with each other respectfully.
Self-actualized people are able to
see through the smoke screen and can therefore engage each other
with authentic in-the-moment presence.
They can listen deeply, without
having an agenda, and they understand that being truly loving is
not achieving a state of invulnerability but achieving a state
of absolute vulnerability.
Compassionate honesty is their
mantra and authentic communication is their vehicle toward deep
connection.
This is, as Daniel J. Siegel
wrote,
"How we dissolve our sometimes
confining sense of 'I' and become a part of an expanding
identity, a 'we' larger than even our interpersonal
relationships. It is how we integrate integration."
6.) They are able to let
go and forgive
"We need a more
capacious model of love.
In this model, love is not
predicated on sharing each other's world as we might
share a soul. It is predicated, instead, on sharing it
as we might share a story…
If stories only succeed when
we consent to suspend disbelief, relationships require
of us something similar: the ability to let go of our
own worldview long enough to be intrigued and moved by
someone else's."
Kathryn Schulz
Two of the most difficult things a
human being can do in this world are to forgive and to act with
compersion.
Self-actualized people are able to
do both of these things. They have the ability to let others
live the way they need to live and the ability to let things go.
Letting things go is a painful process of maturity. It requires
an almost saint-like disposition toward reality.
When it comes to love and
relationships it requires compersion: contrasted with jealousy
as a feeling of joy associated with seeing a loved one love
another. Perhaps the only other emotion more difficult to master
is forgiveness. And sometimes we need both in order to grow and
mature in life and in relationships.
Self-actualized people understand
this and are able to set their egos aside in order to love
holistically and with compassionate detachment. Letting go and
acting with forgiveness is trumping Small Mind, which is petty
and personal, with Big Mind, which is holistic and mature.
Like Rebecca Goldstein wrote
in
Plato at the Googleplex,
"We become more worthy the more
we bend our minds to the impersonal. We become better as we
take in the universe, thinking more about the largeness that
is, and less about the smallness that is us."
7.) They are emotional
alchemists par excellence
"The greatest weapon
against stress is our ability to choose one thought over
another."
William James
Self-actualized people are perennial
alchemists.
They have the ability to transform
anger into strength, fear into courage, and jealousy into
compersion. They know how to empower themselves by controlling
their "negative" emotions through "positive" action.
Self-actualized people understand that the action truly is the
thing. Most people act the way they feel.
But this doesn't have to be the
case. We do have a choice.
With enough
discipline and practice we can actually feel the way we act. For
example: you can "feel" scared but "act" courageous. Similarly,
you can "feel" road rage but "act" calmly. With enough practice
you can eventually feel the way you act.
Through emotional alchemy, happiness
truly is a choice.
Charlie Chaplain said it best,
"Smile though your heart is
aching."
Self-actualized people know how to
transform demons into diamonds, wounds into wisdom, and pain
into strength. They make it a habit to consistently seize the
moment and make the most of it.
Like Aristotle said,
"We are what we repeatedly do.
Excellence, then, is not an act, but a habit."
