by Bernhard Guenther August 11, 2018 from VeilOfReality Website
Many of us can relate to the sense and experience of feeling alone as we shed the matrix cultural/social programming and sincerely start to seek truth.
As we embark on the path we start to learn (or oftentimes "remember"), realize and begin to see a deeper reality within and without us. This new "sight" is contrary to what the masses believe in and how they live their lives by. It is also contrary to whatever we believed to be true at first.
But there was a "splinter in the mind", a seed deep within that inspired us to question what we've been told and taught, most often after a period of intense deeper suffering, responding to the yearning of the soul's call for Truth.
It pushed us to answer the call and step into the "unknown"…and down the rabbit hole we tumble.
As we progress on our path going through our trials, initiations and process of disillusionment, truth starts to become stranger than fiction. We can no longer relate to pleasures and social interactions/enjoyments we may have engaged in enthusiastically in the past.
Even past goals, ambitions and desires we once had and were very attached to start to feel completely foreign to us as we realize that most of our so-called needs/desires/wants (including group/tribe identifications) were based on lies and Matrix programs which we mistook stemming from our "true self" and do not lead us to (nor reflect) true fulfillment, joy and love - the pure state of our soul, hidden deep within us beyond the ego-personality - our unique soul-embodied individuality centered in and around the Divine.
We start to see through appearances and all the pretense:
We realize how little of true Individuality and authenticity there is in the world and how people mistake their conditioned/programmed ego-personality for authenticity/individuality and also mistake all kinds of feelings, desires, cravings within them for their "soul being" (all of which we have done in the past as well to varying degrees… and still may do) - how little of TRUE love there is.
If we are really honest with ourselves, we also question what love truly is and if we have ever experienced it.
The more we uncover and work through our own shadow aspects, our own mechanical programs, our wounds and traumas, the more we see it in others.
As the masks fall away, we start to "see the unseen" and a whole new world - the REAL world - opens up.
At first this view is not pleasant at all and we may question our sanity. Feelings of despair, depression, shame, guilt, anger, sadness, loneliness, etc. come up. Everything we have been hiding and have suppressed for lifetimes starts to come to the surface.
The darkness within and without is being made conscious as we descend into the underworld. The higher we want to rise the deeper we need to go.
The more Light we possess, the more darkness we uncover...
It's the esoteric axiom/law of Descend and Ascend as the same time.
If we are sincere in our process we start to realize that we cannot blame others or anything externally anymore but we are "forced" to take full self-responsibility with radical self-honesty.
The more we awaken, the more we are also confronted with the illusion of control the ego likes to cling to.
There is something else, a higher (divine) force that is pulling us out of inertia and sleep, asking us to surrender to it while at the same time the lower forces want to keep us chained to our past (trapped in the victim/blame cycle), our wounds, programs and identifications.
These occult adverse forces use temptations, ego hooks and thought injections, targeting our blindspots, to keep us plugged in the Matrix.
Ultimately we realize that the battle is and always has been THROUGH us.
We then also start to "see" and sense beyond our five-sensory cognition the mighty occult hyperdimensional forces that move/manipulate not only us but all people like puppets with strings attached.
We realize that there is "something else", hidden from the mind of ordinary consciousness, that controls and manipulates human beings from occult realms, something that feeds on humanity and keeps us in a frequency prison of fear and survival based egoic Service to Self (STS) consciousness.
We also start to see the wounds and traumas people carry, masked and armored under a thick social mask - disconnected from their bodies.
In fact, we start to see how most people suffer deep inside but "don't know" that they are suffering for all the attention and energy is used to escape it via externalizing and projecting/suppressing their pain to avoid the discomfort of feeling it.
Like unconscious drug addicts most people are constantly looking for a "fix", trying to fill a bottomless hole and always looking for love and happiness "out there".
We then start to encounter humans who don't seem to have a soul but are empty shells, occupied by "something else".
The eyes always give it away; all of which becomes more obvious as we cleanse our perception via internal work.
However, not only do we experience isolation and loneliness, pulling back more and more from exterior life, we also become subjected to the projections and attacks of people still "wandering in the wilderness" of the collective Matrix program.
We realize that long time friends and even family members or our spouse/partner are not at all who we "thought" they were - that these connections were often based on the illusion of love, social programming, and we realize how we mistook love for all kinds of behaviors, feelings, and things that are not love but were based on wounds and unconscious feeding mechanisms.
When we tell others about our discoveries and realizations we are most often met with ridicule, made fun of, or even attacked, sometimes even "burned at the stake".
We are being told that we are negative, crazy and live in fear or engage in "fear mongering" when in fact this reaction is their OWN unconscious fear of the Truth projected on to us.
It is their false mechanical ego-personality trying to protect itself from disillusionment with occult forces working through them (using them as unconscious Matrix agents) and attempting to keep us from awaking, speaking truth and anchoring the Divine Force.
Hence, we also realize that we cannot possibly take anything personal anymore, because it is not "them" doing anything.
Moreover, these attacks and interferences also serve a teaching function in the bigger picture of the evolution of consciousness and in the process of our unique soul evolution for all there is are lessons.
These realizations and confronting the lies we've been telling ourselves do indeed lead to a disillusionment, a "moral bankruptcy". It's the necessary "death" everyone has to go through to be reborn in the true Self.
It is the "way out" of the Matrix.
Yet, this loneliness we experience and inability to "fit in" anywhere has its purpose (including the suffering we experience) and if we keep on the track with faith and trust, learning our lessons with sincerity, patience, humility and courage, it will lead us to true love, real companionship and a conscious connection with Spirit/Source as we find our way "back home", reuniting with the Divine.
We start to experience magical positive synchronicities and help/support of the Divine Force that responds to our call and supports and guides us in unexpected ways.
Doors open where there have been no doors before. Out of dark we emerge into the light.
The only way out is through and we realize and experience on an embodied level, not merely philosophically or intellectually, that we were never alone but under a spell of separation from all that IS.
IN-SHADOW - A Modern Odyssey
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