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by
Aletheia Luna
April 27, 2024
from
LonerWolf Website
Spanish
version
There is a light side to the lone wolf - the spiritual
wanderer, outsider, and fringe dweller in society - but there's also
a dark side.
Today, I'm going to speak about both.
As someone whose many years of work have centered around reclaiming
the value and importance of the lone wolf, especially in a spiritual
context, I'd be remiss to ignore the elephant in the room:
Toxic individualism...!
And yes, immature and uninitiated
lone wolfery can lead to toxic individualism - one of the
many plagues that ravages this planet as we speak.
I'll explore why soon.
But, on the flip side, when someone who is a lone wolf becomes
matured through the process of spiritual
awakening and initiated into the
deeper nature of the self, this leads to true individuality
- an antithesis and perhaps antidote to toxic individualism.
If you identify as a lone wolf, social outsider, spiritual wanderer,
fringe dweller, or someone who struggles to fit into society, stay
with me until the end and let me know your own perspective.
The Lone Wolf and Toxic
Individualism
Other than the fact that the label "lone wolf" has often been
applied in a sensationalist shock-and-horror way to mass shooters
and other blood-thirsty psychos in the news, it has increasingly
received other types of criticism.
As we collectively become more aware of issues like,
...and more, the topic of toxic individualism is
on the rise.
Recently, my ears have pricked up more and more at the use of the
term "lone wolf" in a negative way in various podcasts,
conversations, videos, and other information arenas.
"Lone wolf BS" came up most recently in a video where a guy
(rightfully) pointed out that we can't do or achieve everything by
ourselves.
Others make an argument that,
"self-isolation and being a lone wolf are
unhealthy" as well as "separation is an illusion, and so is
being a lone wolf."
And these are all valid points...
Yes, it's true that being a lone wolf can lead to AND be a product
of toxic individualism.
We can't always do everything by ourselves.
Going off on our own can lead to difficulty,
pain, and illusion.
But so can being part of a group.
So can getting lost in groupthink or the soul-numbing 'matrix'
that is destroying society.
There is strength in numbers.
But there's also a different kind of strength in
walking alone...
The Paradox of the 'Lone Wolf'
The paradox of the phrase 'lone wolf' is that the wolf is inherently
a pack creature, just as we humans are.
And yet, the lone wolf breaks the mold and goes their own way -
again, just as we humans are inevitably called to do at least once
in life.
Here is the paradox of the lone wolf put in a simple way:
Alone = All-one...
The mature lone wolf recognizes
that they are both alone but also all-one in their essence.
In the words of poet and philosopher Ralph Waldo Emerson,
The great man is he who in the midst of the
crowd keeps with perfect sweetness the independence of solitude.
Put differently,
the mature lone wolf, the one who can be a
blessing to society, who can play a healing role, is the one who
can be both in the crowd but also centered in themselves.
They are both in the world, but not of
the world...
The Immature and Mature Lone Wolf
I now want to define more clearly the difference between the
immature and mature lone wolf.
The immature lone wolf breaks away
from society by self-isolating and living under the illusion
that they are separate.
In extreme cases, they may become deranged
and violent.
The mature lone wolf, however, may break away from
society and be alone, but they also realize that they cannot
ultimately exist as purely cut-off units.
They recognize that they are interconnected
and interdependent beings, and yet they are also simultaneously
a singular and unique part of the whole.
Put differently:
The immature lone wolf lives reactively and
defensively from a place of pain caused by a feeling of being
separate, and they often feel powerless.
But the mature lone wolf transforms that pain
into a source of power by recognizing that they have a unique
path to walk, one led by
their Soul and not the dictates of the
society, family, or groups they find themselves in.
Individuality vs. Individualism
This leads me to differentiate between individuality
and individualism, and how they relate to the lone
wolf.
Essentially, individuality and individualism aren't the same beasts.
While individualism is a mindset that tries to cling to a false
separate self which doesn't recognize that it's part of a larger
whole, individuality is about seeing yourself as part of the larger
whole but also respecting your uniqueness at the same time.
Individualism is isolating, illusory, and
ego-centric.
True individuality is integrative, introspective, and
soul-centric.
The Lone Wolf and True
Individuality
You
and I, as children, were given a drug:
it was
called approval, it was called appreciation,
it was
called praise, success, acceptance, popularity...
Awake
people break out of this drug.
Anthony de Mello
Let me go a little deeper into the notion of "true" individuality.
Toxic individualism isn't just about self-isolation and
living under the illusion of separation - it's also what happens in
our culture where being an individual is both encouraged and
punished.
If you're too different, too weird, too maladjusted to societal
structures, you're often pathologized by medical institutions,
gaslighted into thinking that you're the broken one, or dismissed
and silenced because you don't fit into the "acceptably
individualistic" mold.
The message is basically this:
"Sure, be different, entertain us, and stand
out - but don't be too different, too subversive, or unique
because that threatens us and the way things are.
And if you're a threat, you will be crushed
and eliminated."
On the flip side - true individuality takes a
180-degree turn and focuses the spotlight internally.
It's similar to psychiatrist Carl Jung's notion of
individuation, which I describe
in the following way in my article on the topic:
[Individuation is] the process of becoming
differentiated and unique, but also a process of becoming whole
and united with others.
Only once you get to know the exact shape of
your piece of the cosmic puzzle, will you be able to find your
place within the puzzle as a whole.
True individuality is about finding your unique
essence and calling - it's about breaking away from the pack and
herd to listen to your soul's voice and walk your true path.
And this requires us to embrace solitude - internally, externally,
or both.
We need to be lone wolves to do this.
In the words of spiritual author and teacher Stephen Batchelor,
By withdrawing from the world into solitude,
you separate yourself from others.
By isolating yourself, you can see more
clearly what distinguishes you from other people.
Standing out in this way serves to affirm
your existence...
Liberated from social pressures and
constraints, solitude can help you understand better what kind
of person you are and what your life is for.
In this way you become independent of others.
You find your own path, your own voice.
Solitude is essential.
And so are lone wolves...
We Need to Honor the Role of the
Lone Wolf in Society
The
poet, the artist, the sleuth,
whoever
sharpens our perception
tends to
be antisocial;
rarely
'well-adjusted,' he cannot go along
with
currents and trends.
A strange
bond often exists
among
antisocial types
in their
power to see environments
as they
really are.
Marshall McLuhan
I get why the lone wolf identity/role has been rejected, feared, and
maligned among so many.
But there's also tremendous power and potential in this inner
calling.
As more and more people
begin waking up, undergoing
spiritual shifts, and feeling isolated within the toxic structures
of society, we need fringe dwellers who can,
provide fresh,
revitalizing, and paradigm-shifting vantage points and perspectives...
We need mature and initiated lone wolves who have been through the
inner archetypal journey of spiritual death and rebirth,
those who
can be the wisdom-keepers, healers, and visionaries that are
in this world but not quite of this world,
...the mystics,
sages, and spiritual wanderers that we need to reclaim a space for
in this society.
I'll be exploring this topic more in the future.
There's simply too much for me to cover here in
completion...
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