by Gary 'Z' McGee
if he were not
sunk in the everydayness
of his own life.
To become aware
of the search
is to be onto
Not to be onto
is to be in
Too many of us are not onto something. Too many of us are in
This is usually because
we're still stuck in
or we're still
locked into a codependent struggle with culture
or we haven't
entered our cocoon phase yet
or we've yet to
Dark Night of the Soul
or we haven't
engaged and reconciled
or we have yet to
be initiated into a Soul-centric perspective because we're
too caught up in an Ego-centric perspective...
The list goes on...
Christian Hopkins Photography
This article isn't about how to work through these things.
This article is about how
to get lost in the process of enlightenment after we've worked
through these things.
What do we do with
the codependent residue?
How do we adapt to
the Desert of the Real?
What do we do with infinity?
How do we negotiate
the Great Mystery?
How do we continue
self-overcoming in a cosmos that dwarfs the self?
What do we do with so
many questions and no answers?
There is a place called
The Labyrinth of Enlightenment,
Beyond the cocoon.
Beyond the Dark Night
of the Soul.
Beyond the Shadow.
Beyond the process of
Beyond the buckling
Here, the journey is 'the
thing.' The search is 'the thing'...
Here, a sense of humor,
curiosity, and imagination are strategies that an enlightened
adventurer uses to leverage his/her personalized finite Fibonacci
sequence (individuated ego) toward the cosmic infinite Phi
Here, the continued
search for your most authentic self is the objective.
But it's not an objective that must be met.
It's not a goal to be
achieved. It's an evolution to be lived through.
It's an adventure
to be had in the moment.
It's a journey to be experienced.
It's a process of trial and error, of ups and downs, of being mostly
wrong but (maybe) sometimes right.
Most of all, it's about being
okay with getting lost in the existential crisis of not
knowing who we are or what the universe is.
Ironically, there's perhaps no better way of finding your most
authentic self than by getting lost. Especially if we can somehow
manage to transform being lost into a meditation.
When we're in this state
of being lost, we
Solitude is beatitude. It is oneness and grace, interdependence and
sacred space. It's being in love with simply being an aspect of an
As Henry David Thoreau said,
"I never found a
companion that was so companionable as solitude."
If it's true that the
more we know the more we realize how much we don't know, then it
stands to reason that there will always be more that is unknown than
This is a daunting
prospect. Especially for someone fresh out of the cocoon/Dark
Hence the reason why it is called the Labyrinth of Enlightenment...
One can easily get
One can easily become
bewildered by the search, confused by the signs, perplexed by
the vicissitudes, and mystified by the Greater Mystery of the
It's a big universe
out there, after all, but we have big imaginations.
Surviving what we've
survived, adapting and overcoming as we have, our imaginations are
Our comfort zones have
been stretched enough that we realize everything is connected to
Our individuality, having overcome codependence, has gracefully
given into interdependence. The cosmos is our oyster, and we are her
That is precisely why
it's okay to 'get lost'...
As long as we're
As long as we're
already in the Labyrinth of Enlightenment
As the Buddha
"There are two
mistakes one can make along the road to Truth: Not going all the
way, and not starting."
We've already "started"
by escaping the Matrix/Cave, by surviving the cocoon and/or the Dark
Night, by overcoming the codependent ego.
Now, we have only to "go
all the way." And that means 'getting lost' sometimes...
That means being
confused, overwhelmed, full of questions, and in a constant state of
If the journey is truly 'the thing,' then it's okay to get lost.
It's okay that we don't
know. It's okay that we don't have the answers. It's okay that we
will never find our way out of the maze. It's okay that our finite
perspective cannot grasp an infinite reality.
It's even okay that we sometimes give in to the psychosocial
gravitational pull of the codependent Matrix from time to time. It's
okay that inside our enlightened butterfly souls there will always
be an ugly ignorant caterpillar.
The more we adapt to our own self-improvement, and the more we
overcome our previous selves, the more we realize how impossible it
is to be perfect or to be completely enlightened.
And that too is okay...
On a long enough timeline
nothing is perfect. Our sense of humor is our saving grace.
Getting lost keeps us humble.
It keeps us grounded.
It keeps us in a
constant state of astonishment, so that we are better able to
appreciate beauty, to honor paradox, to be open to new
experiences, to be flexible and adaptable rather than closed off
and dogmatic, to be humorous and vulnerable rather than serious
We're in the Goddamned
Labyrinth of Enlightenment, for fu$@s sake!
There's no room for
the kind of thinking that traps us into "not being onto
There's no room for a
lack of imagination that traps us into "not going all the way."
There's no place for
"I'm afraid of being lost" because being lost is what we are at
the core of our species.
The raw, deep-down,
claws-in-heart truth is that we are a profoundly overwhelmed animal
dwarfed by a magnanimously unintelligible universe.
'Being lost' is what we
are. And that's okay. We might as well embrace it. We might as well
have a laugh about it.
So, I implore you, you who have painstakingly entered the
Labyrinth of Enlightenment with courage in your heart and
laughter in your throat, get lost as fast as possible.
Wander aimlessly in
the maze of You...
Become "aware of the
Therein will you discover
adventure, hunger, passion, love, and the kind of courage that
After all, it is only when you're lost that you need to be found.
And since our objective is to discover our most authentic self,
being lost is the only way to be "found"...